Wallowing

from I EXIST by Erik Saxton

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lyrics

Could you tell me what I did last night?
And if you could could you then tell me if I seemed alright?
Cuz then I'll know if my façade is fading
Like the two of us
Faded on a hill between the highway, and a parking lot

I've picked out glass from the grass and my fingertips
Last night all my lights got smashed and I can't get a grip
All the cuts on my hands and on my mind
Two separate things that seem to get intertwined

I tell myself it'll get better
Somehow
Every night that I can't remember
I can't remember

Could you tell me what I did last night?
And if you could could you then tell me if I seemed alright?
Cuz then I'll know if my façade is fading
Like the two of us
Faded on a hill between the highway, and a parking lot

I've been kicking cans by the vans parked on the street
Saw your house, bounced from the sidewalk where we would meet
Met my maker in tall glass bottles
That are lining the spaces where I try to coddle

The fear
I tell myself that I'm better
Than this
That's when I can't remember
I can't remember

I've cried in lots, speaking taught, thin, sentences
By the fields and faces I take comfort
In my own way, I died for my sins
I'll be reborn tomorrow, wallowing.

credits

from I EXIST, released May 7, 2021

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Erik Saxton Minneapolis, Minnesota

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